Des Moines, IA

Marriage Counseling

Looking for marriage counseling in Des Moines and surrounding areas? Real Connections Counseling offers co-therapy, which consistently changes clients' lives. They'll help you navigate difficult situations and achieve real connections.
Couple on date in street with coffee cup

Realizing the marriage that could be

With marriage counseling, we work with a married couple to help improve, stabilize, or restore their relationship. Our initial goal and direction will help you recognize what your relationship was, is, and could be.

We may discuss your past, your family of origin, and its impact on your marriage. Sometimes we concentrate on the baggage you brought to the relationship before and even after marriage. And we could focus on your relationship dance. When couples dancers are out of step, they jeopardize the dance and the other’s safety. Likewise, your ‘unhealthy dance moves’ today potentially jeopardize your relationships… maybe you are stepping on each other’s toes!

You can heal. Your life can be so much better and stronger together! You both can make that happen together!

What makes us unique


You know what you have with CoTherapy at Real Connections Counseling? Access to one of the most successful couples counseling and coaching methods we’ve seen.

What sets us apart? The team. You have more support, and you feel safer, and comfortable that both of your needs will be met. And you'll not wonder whether you've been heard. Your team wants to succeed with you, not bias against you.

Watch the video, then Contact Real Connections Counseling today and embark on your journey with us.

Learn More about our Marriage Counseling

Discover how marriage counseling works, its effectiveness, and how it can save marriages with experienced counselors.
woman in brown coat wearing black framed eyeglasses

How does Marriage Counseling work?

What do your vows say? Did they tell you you’d be theirs in every situation, whether sick or healthy, poor or wealthy? Most couples expressed the above statements and more on their wedding day. The marriage counseling process is first to take a hard look at your vows and then build toward them. Along the way, they learn new communication patterns, relationship history, & a host of other factors that can be used to help you. We guide you toward becoming intimate partners and best friends.

Co-therapy teaches you and your partner about being each other’s hero, playmate, confidant, partner, and lover. You talk about choices, and our counselors guide you to find ways to be interested in each other’s uniqueness. 

man in white dress shirt holding a woman in brown long sleeve shirt

How effective is Marriage Counseling?

Your success is up to you. You learn that success means considering how you will be together in your mutual “for better and for worse” part of your vows.  Our counselors help you practice your relationship. Anything practiced will improve; that is how you can make your best relationship happen.

man in white dress shirt hugging woman in white dress

Can Marriage Counseling Save Marriages?

Your lives, and your stories, matter. We are about enhancing your unique relationship and helping you improve your lives. Marriage counseling can be challenging, and it can be fun. Know one thing…this is something you’ll learn the first day we shake hands: You are not the problem. The problem is the problem. You can solve problems together.

You have issues, but these issues are not your core identity. Your problems are imposters and create havoc when you’ve lost the memory of who you were and are and who you can be with your spouse. Problems arise from the chaos. We help you understand chaos and then fight it. To do this, we help you reframe and rewrite your story.

person in black long sleeve shirt holding babys feet

How long does marriage counseling take?

Real Connections Counseling offers longer sessions of 80 minutes, 2 or 4 hours.

These options provide couples enough time to progress towards their relationship goals. 

The therapy duration varies depending on the couple's needs, goals, and effort—however, the average session amount is 10-15 sessions

The counselors check in regularly to ensure the goals are met, and therapy is about collaboration between the couple and the therapists. Marriage counseling requires dedication, patience, and practice but offers excellent benefits for the long-term health of a relationship.

woman and man

What is play therapy for couples?

Remember the last time you played with your spouse or partner? At Real Connections Counseling, you’ll learn to play again. Playing together gives you a renewed opportunity to create intimacy and be the best version of your relationship.

Meet the Team

Our life as counseling partners is also our life’s work. We bring our own unique personalities and approaches to counseling that actually becomes a unique asset to our couples and families.
Rick Elgersma

Rick Elgersma

LMFT, M. Litt

Monique Elgersma

Cora Drew

Cora Drew

Jess Hall

Jess Hall

Alyssa Elgersma

Alyssa Elgersma


Contact us to get Started

We're here to help, please reach out and we’ll help at our earliest convenience.
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